The first time I fasted during lent was a couple of years ago when Kris challenged us to fast. Amanda and I had just purchased our first house on Paul Ave- a beautiful 3 bedroom house - brand new . I remember Kris preached about doubting Thomas - and how Thomas needed proof of Jesus' return.
Anyway- I had never fasted before and I decided to be prayful and meditate on what Lent was all about and how Thomas was made to believe.
Well, The first day was okay - until dinner time - huge pangs of hunger. But, I relaxed and said a prayer - I have it off pretty darn easy I can make it through this. I could go raid the pantry- but that's way too easy. I went to bed and slept fine.
I awoke-and all I could think about were eggs, bacon, cereal, cinabons, and strawberries - at the time I didn't even eat breakfast - it was the thought of depriving myself that was Eating away at me. This went on. I couldn't concentrate. The new big screen t.v. with all its High Definition glory couldn't keep my attention. With a deep sigh, I got up out of my easy chair and decided to go on a walk. Amanda was out with a friend that day - so it was me just wandering the neighborhood.
I walked around for a while - perfect weather. Then I came upon some brand new unfinished houses - I thought what the heck I'll wonder through. This house was enormous - I think twice the size of our recently purchased house. Porches, bedrooms, bathrooms, garden tubs, it was large and really well thought out. Then I went downstairs and thought "this would be perfect for my office. I could put my computer here and maybe another over there. Oh, I could even put in a sound proof closet here. And an edit suite for features here and the storage down here..."
"STOP!" I screamed to myself. "You selfish SOB. Why do you need this? This is outrageous. You have an office at your brand new house - Yeah the new house that has granite countertops and an ice machine. I am so selfish."
On and on, I beat myself up. I walked up the stairs from that unfinished basement and out of the house - hating what seemed to be greed and loving the dream of a full production office.
As I walked away my head was down. I felt so ungrateful. I slowly walked down the long driveway and down the road. I decided to pray.
I prayed "Father, please forgive me for not being happy with my beautiful home. You have overwhelmed us. I am very grateful for what blessings you have given us - and I will work to make you proud. I will not think of this again...please forgive me, I am very ungrateful...unless you want me to do so."
I stopped walking. "I feel better," I thought and let out a big sigh. I raised my head. The street sign for the unfinished house read "Thomas Road."
Thomas Road. I cried.
We sold our old house and moved into the new house - all within two months. The realtor and builder finished the basement which is now my office with such care. He has a home business and really loved the idea of helping us out so he took us under his wing- and brought such wonderful ideas to the house - he even put in a fenced in backyard for our yorkie poos - all of this included in the original price.
So, our business is strong. And, I feel the work we have produced has touched people's lives - it's become a ministry of sorts.
That was the first time I fasted.